So I get on the T this morning, and some dude is squished right up next to me. He lets a huge one. It smelled like a sewage treatment plant exploded. Seriously. Actually, I guess in a biological way, one had. Anyway, no matter which way I turn, I’m caught in the lethal cloud of his gaseous emission. What’s more is he can’t stop! It’s hot and crowded and the air is stale enough on the train, and this dude who must’ve eaten a mountain of rotting beans for breakfast is nonchalantly reading his Herald and fumigating the entire car. I was really happy to be at the end of the line for a change and get out!
Then on the way home this loud crowd of about 8 or 9 teenagers gets on the crowded train and begins to yell loudly at each other, laughing raucously. Every other word out of their mouths was “nigga.” I felt like my grandmother or something–really old. Here I was, squished up again against my fellow passengers, this time loud, obnoxious youngsters who feel the need to loudly comment on me trying to sleep and try to wake me up by shouting (I was sitting down with my eyes closed) “NIGGA I THINK SHE SLEEPIN’!” I might have been amused had I not been the one being shouted to. Kids these days!
At work this week I got to witness not one but TWO of my brilliant ideas being useful to customers. I love it when dumb little projects I make up for myself actually come to something! One dude brought up a stack of Super Audio CDs to buy. When I asked if he knew they were SACDs blah blah blah (I do that because half the time people don’t realize it, and they won’t work on normal CD players), and he said “yes.” He was glad that they were labelled on the tops to they were easy to spot. Yeah, that was my idea. I put hot pink stickers with “SACD!” written in bold black letters on the tops of each one, and then put a big pink sticker on the front explaining what that meant so people would get the message twice. Sound like overkill to you? Well, we sold like 10 SACDs to this one guy thanks to my genius idea. So there!
The other idea is way to mundane to describe here. It involves way too much explanation for not a very spectacular-sounding result. Needless to say, some of the anal-retentive shizzle I come up with can be useful. Hah.
Speaking of “anal retentive,” you can tell where my mind is these days–there’s this benefit CD called “Do They Know it’s Halloween” which features “An all-star” bunch of people. However, upon first looking at it, all I saw was “ANAL.” Maybe it was all the commuter farting that put me in that frame of mind.
By the way, the new Colder CD is awesome. I’m really digging it, though it’s more rock-oriented than the last one. It sounds a lot like Joy Division in places, but not in a lame way. There’s a lot of bass on it. It rules.
