This is why I need to clean my apartment. My boyfriend is missing! He’s only been inflated for a week or so! I hope he hasn’t been punctured, and is lying in some flaccid heap someplace under a pile of rubble. Oh wait, there he is.
Check out my new boyfriend!
He’s the ULTRAboyfriend (har har har). He tends to be full of hot air sometimes, though (his name is Pierre). I’ve decided that I seem to be the ultimate repellent to all men who aren’t one or more of the following: homeless, schizophrenic, retarded, drug addicted, and/or drunks, I’ll get my own stud. He knows when to shut up, AND he doesn’t ridicule me for liking Big Country!
Oh wow. i’m still really drunk. Darn you, Terrence Jones! Terrence made dinner tonight, and I went over there and indulged in tons of awesome food and drink. Unfortunately, the drink was stronger than I thought it was going to be…
Before this, I saw 1468 or whatever number that Stephen King movie with Samuel L. and John Cusack was with Patty today. I am genetically incapable of remembering numbers, so I’ll never have any clue what it was. It was really scary. It was good old-fashined creepy-scary, not gory-scary. I like creepy-scary. I want to roll back time and be the art director for that film. It looked like way fun. Dammit, I want to be an art director for movies. How the heck does one get into that biz? Probably by not failing Art Direction in their lousy loser 2-year college for beginners. Alas.
Speaking of what I want to be when I grow up, I have a Long-Term Goal now. I’m going to get a book published by the time I’m 40. I don’t know what book that will be (I have a bunch of different ones started, fiction and non-fiction), but I’m giving myself 5.5 years to get this shit on track. It’s kind of nice having a goal in life for a change. I mean, I usually plan a goal, don’t give myself enough time to realize it, and freak out someplace in the middle because I’m putting too much pressure on myself to not be a total loser. So, anyway, here’s the New Improved, Goal-Driven Scooter. Enjoy it while it lasts.
