More Kind of Dumb Band Names
Ok, I work in a record store, and am constantly seeing band names that make me snort. Here's part II of my list of Kind of Dumb Band Names. To balance it out, I've also listed some of my favorite band names!
As before, I am not making any kind of judgement on the talent of these bands (in most cases I've never even heard them); I'm simply making fun of their names.
| Band Name | My Inane Commentary |
|---|---|
| ///seizethemoment. | ///rollseyes. |
| 3 Colours Red | all 3 are red? Why not just call yourselves Red? |
| A Band of Horses | I checked, there are no actual horses in this band. False advertising! |
| A Love Ends Suicide | I thought death ended suicide, but what do I know? -- oops, this one was on my other list too. I just can't stop commenting on it! |
| Acid Horse | alert PETA |
| All Shall Perish | come on, ALL? |
| Audioslave | rawk on, dude! |
| Befour Three O'Clock | Get it? befour? Like the number? |
| Bloodlined Calligraphy | If you just wrote in blood, it would be much easier. |
| Born From Pain | Their moms should have had an epidural. |
| Brothermandude | get a haircut, son! |
| Cannibal Corpse | doesn't this mean that this corpse eats other corpses? That's not very exciting. |
| Chin Up Chin Up | Buck Up, Little Camper was probably already taken. Plus, I hated doing chin-ups in gym class. |
| combatwoundedveteran | thisnospacethingisreallygettingannoying |
| Destroy Destroy Destroy | Was "Destroy Destroy" already taken? |
| Destroyer Destroyer | I think "Destroyer" was already taken. |
| Die Princess Die | It would be funnier if they had been Die, Princess Di, but alas they are comma and humor-less. |
| Do Make Say Think | make sure you do in that order. |
| DRAGONFORCE | D&DPLAYERS |
| Dry Kill Logic | Yeah. What they said. |
| five.bolt.main | what.does.this.mean? |
| Heavy Heavy Low Low | Really Really Dumb Dumb |
| Hoobastank | unlike Chumbawamba or Bananarama, this silly word sounds like something left over from a public porta-potty. |
| Horse the Band | as opposed to Horse the Animal, Horse the Plumber and Horse the Recreational Drug. |
| I Am Ghost | Nice to meet you, Ghost. |
| I Killed the Prom Queen | Want a medal? |
| Krokus | a crocus is a pretty spring flower. It doesn't sound very metal, even with K's. |
| Leaves' Eyes | but... leaves don't have eyes! I would like Leaves Eyes, insinuating that something leaves eyes lying around everywhere. That might be cool. |
| Life Without Buildings | maybe it would be nice if we just all went camping. Ever think of that? |
| Limp Bizkit | sounds vaguely phallic, even with the poor spelling. |
| Love As Laughter | uh-huh |
| Love is Red | We Work For Hallmark |
| Mewithoutyou | Ican'teventouchthisone |
| Misery Signals | Captain, we are picking up misery signals from the other ship. They are broadcasting the International Signal for Misery! |
| Monty Are I | So Monty is a collective that is also you. Well then. |
| Morbid Angel | Wait, angels are already dead, so this kind of makes sense. |
| Mute Math | thank goodness math can't talk to me. |
| My Dad is Dead | I'm glad you are over it enough to advertize. |
| Mystic Prophesy | how many prophesies are *not* mystic? Come on, you could have thought of a better adjective. |
| Necrodeath | come on-- necro means "death." I guess Necronomicon, Necromicon, Necro, the Necros, Necromantix etc have already been taken... |
| Now It's Overheard | darn it! Be quieter next time! |
| Of Montreal | It might be less annoying if they were actually from Montreal. |
| Queens of the Stone Age | I'd like to see a Neanderthal drag queen. Hey, Neanderthal Drag Queen would make a good band name! |
| Rachel's | Rachel's what? |
| Rein Sanction | huh? |
| Rhapsody of Fire | yawn |
| Scars of Tomorrow | that's awfully pessimistic. |
| Severe Torture | Can you even have mild torture? |
| Sincebyman | I'massumingthisisabiblicalreferencebutevensoitsucks. |
| Sirens Sister | Apostrophes are your friends. |
| Slint | this is not a real word. |
| Slunt | neither is this. |
| Sparklehorse | Sounds like a My Little Pony reject |
| Staind | Proper spelling is cool, people! Use it! |
| Stone Temple Pilots | Yay. Your initials are STP. Yippee. |
| Strawberry Alarm Clock | trippy, maaaaan |
| Suffocate Faster | I'm trying, OK? |
| Suicide Silence | Today's program brought to you by the Letter S. |
| Sunn O))) | Do you pronounce the 0))) part, or does it just look like the sun? |
| Tech N9ne | Come on, a 9 doesn't even look like an "i." You should pronounce this Tech N-nine-ne like Nnnnnniney |
| The Crownhate Ruin | um… yeah. |
| The Rose Of Avalanche | This sounds randomly generated, and not in a good way. |
| These Arms Are Snakes | I hope these arms aren't poisonous. |
| Too Pure to Die | Get over yourself. |
| Trapt | Is this how the Pilgrims spelled it? |
| Under the Influence of Giants | Did you smoke them or drink them? |
| Velvet Acid Christ | We want to be edgy and be filed near the Velvet Underground. |
| Wheatus | Sounds like a breakfast cereal |
| Yellowcard | One half of a Green Card. |
| You Am I | no you am not. |